Introspection

I made this little patch of tomato pin cushions yesterday from an article on MarthaStewart.com. Handsewing, although I'm not terribly good at it, is extremely therapeutic for me. Especially when I can make something so quickly, with such adorable results. These are supposed to be heirloom tomatoes, so they're a bit flatter and more gathered than the traditional tomato pincushion. And they are much cuter in person.

I feel like I've made a lot of drastic changes in my life lately, and the introspection that comes from that has been healthy for me I think. Sometimes, I think people get so wrapped up in their lives that they don't take time to evaluate where they are. Am I happy? Am I where I want to be? Does the place I am now lead me to where I want to go? I must say that the place I was was not where I wanted to be. It was not leading me to where I wanted to go.

But now, I've made changes. I've quit my job, I'm working on a new venture, I'm exercising every day (almost!), I'm enjoying my life, and not letting things control me. By nature, I'm not one to stir anything up. I like to float along and make everyone happy. I want to be the best I can, because I think it will make other people happy if I'm working hard doing what they want me to. Because of this, it was hard for me to make these changes. I don't think it's a bad thing to want to make other people happy, but there is truth to the addage that you can't make others happy unless you, yourself are in that place first.

The problem with my situation, is that people take advantage of the kindness. I offer myself with the hopes that others will treat me in the same manner that I treat them with. But human nature is not to reciprocate, but to take advantage of. What can this person do for me? I am done with being taken advantage of.

So now I'm home, and I finally feel like myself again. I feel like in part, I haven't been in this place for a while. I haven't felt this satisfied with myself, my life, and my work. But I do now, and it's a great feeling. It's interesting to me, because I thought I'd feel better because my house would be clean, or my laundry would always be done, but it isn't. I'm just where I should be, and that's what feels great.

So is this how everyone feels when they find their place in life? I certainly hope so. What a drab existence it would be to linger where you aren't happy and at peace. Are you where you want to be? I certainly hope so. And in the event that you aren't: get there. There's no point in not being happy.

Adam fell that men might be, and men are that they might have JOY. -2 Ne. 2:25

And if you're interested in tomato pincushions, I think I'll put them in my etsy shop once it's up and running, because I have no use for the growing plethora of them, and I have no intention of stopping production anytime soon. And I took pictures of making the red one, so I might post those in the form of a tutorial here soon (so you could make your own). Or you could just find them on Martha. They're incredibly easy, and so fun.